I recently read the lead article of Crosswalk.com’s newsletter which arrived in my inbox on November 1, 2013. The article was, How to Spot a Healthy Church–Quickly, by Ray Pritchard. Ray suggests there are two indicators of a healthy church that visitors can spot immediately. The first one is hearty congregational singing. The second one caught my attention: obvious affection between the pastor and the congregation. It made me wonder what we can do while we preach to show genuine affection.
I’m a firm believer that people skills have a greater affect on a sermon’s hearing than exegetical skills. I must love my listeners as much as, if not more than, I love to study and preach to them. And the affect of interpersonal relationships on communication are well documented. Every communication event, including preaching, contains a content element and a relational element. The relational element affects how we receive the content and what we do with it. When our relationship with our congregants is healthy, they place more importance on our content. When our relationship is unhealthy, they place less importance on our content. In an unhealthy relationship, the words don’t mean as much or the same thing we intend. That’s part of the reason why when two people are arguing during tense times, you’ll hear something like, “That’s not what I meant!”
So, what can we do to let our listeners know we love them while we’re preaching?
- smile at them
- laugh with them
- dialogue with them (besides being an effective teaching tool, dialogue during a teaching time is a great way to build rapport)
- tell them (say things like, “you know I love you dearly…”, at appropriate times
- join them as a fellow struggler on the Way
- (add some others…)
Does your faith-family know you love them? Let it show while you’re preaching. Our best listeners are the ones who feel the love.
I really like to make specific application of major points by saying “Church Family…”. I use that term the most when speaking and I include myself as a part of the family. I’m sure there are other ways I could add to my sermon to show my love for them. Thanks for the reminder!
Thanks, Al. I noticed you did that when I listened to your final sermon on Jonah. You’re such an imposing figure, but I sensed a tenderness in your preaching. A smile goes a long way, as you well know. One of the things I enjoyed most listening was the sense that you have developed an excellent rapport with your faith-family.
We had a guest preacher yesterday who showed incredible love for a congregation that he didn’t even know personally. In the middle of his sermon, he noticed one of our members in need of medical attention. He stopped his sermon and called the attention of any medical personnel in the building. When it was appropriate, he asked us to join him in prayer for the individual. This is a great reason why preachers should keep eye-contact and be attentive to the audience.
Such a concrete example, Brian. What a shame if nothing was said or done! Imagine arguing, “The sermon’s too important to show the love of Christ.”
Hi Randy, Just to let you know that I am reading your articles. Please keep righting. This one prompted my response—it is soooo true the relationships create or destroy learning. Thanks for the reminder! I’ll remind my congregation again this Sunday! Blessings!
Lanny, thanks for writing and for encouraging words. You are one of those preachers who has developed incredible rapport with the people and it shows when you preach. I hope Jocie is doing well. You both are appreciated and missed.