I recently read the lead article of Crosswalk.com’s newsletter which arrived in my inbox on November 1, 2013. The article was, How to Spot a Healthy Church–Quickly, by Ray Pritchard. Ray suggests there are two indicators of a healthy church that visitors can spot immediately. The first one is hearty congregational singing. The second one caught my attention: obvious affection between the pastor and the congregation. It made me wonder what we can do while we preach to show genuine affection.
I’m a firm believer that people skills have a greater affect on a sermon’s hearing than exegetical skills. I must love my listeners as much as, if not more than, I love to study and preach to them. And the affect of interpersonal relationships on communication are well documented. Every communication event, including preaching, contains a content element and a relational element. The relational element affects how we receive the content and what we do with it. When our relationship with our congregants is healthy, they place more importance on our content. When our relationship is unhealthy, they place less importance on our content. In an unhealthy relationship, the words don’t mean as much or the same thing we intend. That’s part of the reason why when two people are arguing during tense times, you’ll hear something like, “That’s not what I meant!”
So, what can we do to let our listeners know we love them while we’re preaching?
- smile at them
- laugh with them
- dialogue with them (besides being an effective teaching tool, dialogue during a teaching time is a great way to build rapport)
- tell them (say things like, “you know I love you dearly…”, at appropriate times
- join them as a fellow struggler on the Way
- (add some others…)
Does your faith-family know you love them? Let it show while you’re preaching. Our best listeners are the ones who feel the love.